>>>>>>THE PATH<<<<<<<

"Perform every action with your heart fixed on the Supreme Lord. Renounce attachment to the fruits. Be even-tempered in success and failure, for it is this evenness of temper which is meant by yoga.

"Work done with anxiety about results is far inferior to work done without such anxiety, in the calm of self-surrender. Seek refuge in the knowledge of Brahman. They who work selfishly for results are miserable.

"In the calm of self-surrender you can free yourself from the bondage of virtue and vice during this very life. Devote yourself, therefore, to reaching union with Brahman. To unite the heart with Brahman and then to act: that is the secret of non-attached work. In the calm of self-surrender, the seers rounounce the fruits of their actions, and so reach enlightment. Then they are free from the bondage of rebirth, and pass to that state which is beyond all evil."

"The Song of God: Bhadavad-Gita" Translated by Swami Prabhavananada and Christopher Isherwood, 1972, the Vedanta Society. pp: 40-41


Upon reading this passage, I realize that it is so amazingly accurate - even if you are not Hindu or have any calling to understand any sect of the hindu beliefs and philosophies, the practical truth still exists. When dissected and reviewed, the simple terms suggest that we do our work as it needs to be done, to the best of our ability because it is our duty to do so.. and because we do it to the best of our ability, then we need only to be calm while said work is in process without concerning ourselves with the results of the task, the paycheck that comes as a result of doing our job (if that is indeed our work), or the types of decisions of others. We can only control ourselves, and therefore, it is better to move forward in peace and the only way to accomplish taht is to detach from the results of our actions. If we perform Right Action, then the results will be as they should be therefore require no concern. If a mistake is made, we are still human, but do not fret upon that mistake and simply do your duty to rectify it and go on.

In short, we try too hard to control everything else other than the one thing we have ultimate control over - ourselves. How much better off would we be as iindividuals, a society, a world if we sought our own innter peace and tranquility instead of harboring the stress that naturally comes forth when we focus so intently on outcome? I know that this is true for me.

Although I will continue my inward journey, seeking to clear the darkness and enter light into those regions of my past that I have for too long allowed to undermine my present and my future, I will simultaneously seek to know and become closer to my Atman. I had an epipheny several days that I focus too much on controlling those things that cannot be controlled and fearing that which I cannot grasp strongly enough to bend to my will.

Like every human being, every journey I take, every turn that leads to some new grain of knowledge, I seek internal peace; bliss if you will. Knowledge is only a part of the journey. Another part is taking the time to actively delve deep within ourselves, beyond the material; beyond the now; beyond the past; beyond the pain; beyond the joy; beyond ourselves in these contexts.

No matter what spiritual belief you hold, even if it's none at all, there is a place within each of us that holds the key to our own happiness. Happiness is a moment, a grain of sand in eternal time. However, even during times of sorrow, anger, passion, or joy, there is another source of peace that lies in wait - waiting for us to seek it out and bring it forth and overshadow all other superficial emotions.

Do not mistake the meaning of superficial... it does not mean that those emotions are not real. It means that they are more geared towards the surface of our being; they are the first "impression" emotions; our reactions vs. our internal control of our existence. Reactions are consequence; actions are not. Should we perpetually be beings of consequence or would it be preferable to be one of action?

My attic is one massive consequence. The consequence of superficial emotion because that inner peace has not been found and given the power to supercede. My goal, henceforth, is to continue my progress but to move forward with greater wisdom and less fear. To move beyond superficiality and consequence and into self-discipline and action. I may not find Atman in this life - I may not find pure bliss - but there will be greater satisfaction which stems from my spiritual as well as my psychological journey.

This is one of the gaping holes, a window that has been covered so thickly that I had all but completely forgotten it. I have paused in my other duties to relocate it and clean it off as best I can. Now, there is a little more light here. There is a little less fear. Hope has been given strength. I look in this Light, calm, yet anxious about my ability to maintain my committment to make it sparkle. It is a must, however. It is a spiritual requirement for me to increase the opportunity for the Light to enter into this cavernous arena in which fear, anxiety, unfulfilled dreams and heartbreak have all wrestled and intermingled - binding and writhing, pushing against the walls of my being and stretching my mentality to capacity.

It is time to embrace them and go beyond.... into the Light and as close to Atman as I can get in this lifetime.